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DREADLOCK GIRL REVISES "DON'T NEED DRUGS" POLICY

NOWHERE TO SIT DOWN

Oblivious squatparty sex symbol from London, with like bits of pink and green in her hair and that, who you know does a bit of poi and drinks chai at parties and stuff, has revised her long-held opinion that people do NOT need drugs to have a good time at psy parties.


Speaking to psyreviews from the massive pile of fluoro paints she inexplicably owns, she explained that "after caning it for years, i then started going along and getting pissed. Which then became boring, so i stopped drinking. I was having bad dreams at the time so i stopped smoking pot as well, which meant I was basically completely clean going to psy parties."


"For years I loved it. The people, the smiles, the music, the love. Then suddenly I realised I was basically standing around with a load of fucked hippies, which is sheer purgatory when you think about it."


"Then I realised that we're all basically bobbing up and down to the same bassline all night, often paying a lot of money for the privilige. The toilets are all disgusting, there's loads of blokes with their shirts off, and there's nowhere to sit down."


Sketching out violently at the suggestion that she may simply be "getting too old for all this," she conceded that she plans to get a haircut, start listening to decent music, and take up that lucrative barrister's job with an unnamed City law firm.